I thought I had met the busiest man alive, but I was completely wrong. Today I met the real busiest man alive.
He was using the urinal next to me and EATING A HAM SANDWICH! I so wish I was making this up, believe me, but there he was. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt, maybe he was walking along with a ham sandwich when a bathroom crisis occured. But no, he wasn’t just holding the ham sandwich, he was taking bites and eating it. I know I should have said something to him, or at least hit him in the back of the head, but I was too shocked to react.
Who brings a sandwich into the bathroom at all? Everyone knows that any food object that gets within twelve feet of a urinal is no longer edible. If I am chewing gum as I walk past the bathroom I walk on the other side of the hall just so I don’t cross the twelve foot barrier.
When you are so busy that your eating and urination schedules have to overlap you have miss-planned your day.