I once watched a lizard have a heart attack as it ran up a wall.
I suppose it’s possible that the lizard didn’t have a heart attack…maybe it slipped and fell to its death. One minute scurrying sure-footedly, the next, free-falling to a back-flop on the concrete?
I just never expect to see an animal fall. You know, the Majesty of Nature and all… but I bet it’s not really all that majestic. How many mountain goats trip and fall to their deaths each year? How often do eagles dive-bomb their prey and overshoot, only to slam into the ground and tumble in feathery cartwheels? I bet monkeys miss the next branch and land on their butts all the time.
Someone must have stats on this kind of stuff.
I watched a show on Komodo Dragons the other day. This nine-foot, two hundred pound lizard, trailing three-foot streams of bacteria-fortified saliva, ambled up to a herd of wild deer—and they did not run. The dragon, of course, bit one of the deer, dooming it to death by blood poisoning and eventual eating-by-giant-lizard.
Again, it was a NINE-FOOT LIZARD WITH THREE-FOOT STREAMS OF SALIVA! Come on deer, OF COURSE it bit you! If a nine-foot lizard enters the same state I will run. I only live in Utah because the zoo here is too crappy to have Komodo Dragons.
Actually, after watching that, I may stop being afraid of Komodo Dragons. I don’t think it’s smart enough to catch an animal that doesn’t just sit and wait to be eaten. Its entire hunting strategy consisted of lumbering into the middle of a deer herd and biting the nearest dimwit (though that didn’t stop the narrator from calling it an “ambush”).
As long as I am at it, I may drop my long-standing policy of being terrified of lions too. I could easily outsmart a lion. I can picture telling my grandchildren the story, “…and as the lion was about to pounce I shouted, ”What’s that?!“ and pointed behind him. As he turned to look I kicked him right in the nuts. He crumpled to the ground and I bit him on the nose for good measure.”
Then I would refill my pipe.
Stupid animals.